Blinded by Envy

As she sat there describing the pain of her relationship with her mother and how it was so unbearable, she mentioned that her mother no longer moved money into her accounts. Mind you, we’re all adults well out of our youth. 

She said that, and I thought, “That must be nice.”

She’s sitting there describing the pain of a relationship fraught with turmoil, and I’m thinking wouldn’t it be nice to be in a richer family where it was no problem for my parents to constantly supply me with money… She’s crying. 

And somehow I’ve missed the whole point. 

You see, how often do we envy and covet what others have. We think that whatever “it” is will make our lives easier. 

And we miss the point. 

We allow ourselves to be blinded by envy. 

Money was not making her life “easier.” In fact it had led, in this case, to a strained relationship with the person she should be closest with. 

But we miss the point. Because we allow our own desires to get in the way. This woman needed a friend. She needed someone to listen and to care. 

I could be those things. But that thought got in the way. It turned my heart from empathizing to feeling envy. And that put up a wall. 

Now, thankfully, the moment I had that thought, I noticed it. I saw it. I recognized it for what it was. A lie. It was a lie about what pleases us. A lie about what we need in life. 

So I am thankful that God has given me eyes to see. Eyes that were open to the lie. That saw it in that moment for what it was. 

Envy can run so deep that it can blind us. Spiritual eyes can expose it for what it is. 

How do we get spiritual eyes? We must grow. We must learn about God’s truth. We must read his word constantly. We must allow ourselves to not think we are better than others. We must see that Jesus’ love was for each of us and that we all are in desperate need for him. My need is not less than hers. I am not superior in any way to her. 

Lord, help me to see others as you see them.

(This entire interaction was actually a dream I had. Isn’t it amazing how our dreams mimic our hidden desires and inner conflicts?)

What is a way you’ve been blinded from loving someone well? How have you developed “spiritual eyes”? Comment below.